I must admit that the anniversary of Asa's death kind of popped up out of nowhere this year. I think that may be God protecting my heart from the heaviness and weight it suffered for a full week last year. I'm not saying Asa doesn't pop into my mind on a daily basis. The kids talk about him - though Lily is mostly through retelling of stories she hears. We talk about him, miss him, still hear his laugh, see him throw his head back belly-laughing at the kids, and are grateful he did not have to endure that football game last night!
I am grateful for the amount of healing and grieving I was able to do this year. I think I spent the first year making sure everyone else was doing okay, and didn't take the time to process it all myself. This year I did. I shed many, many tears; got angry; grieved with Thomas who shed many tears over Papa this year; and, listened for Asa's laugh. Lily found a picture of Asa and me at my wedding, and quickly said, "Mommy, you married Papa?!" She was perplexed to see us standing together with him in a tuxedo and me in my dress. I loved it! She was relieved to hear that I did indeed only marry her daddy that day, and Papa was married to Gran. :)
Please feel free to click on the Asa tag at the bottom of this post, and see the other posts and many pictures of the man who treated me like his very own daughter for 19 years of my life. Read Jeremy's eulogy, too. It is such a great description and dedication to Asa. Look at the joy on his face and my kids' faces as they share cuddles and memories. Priceless! I am so glad to have these pictures to look over today. (And that my kids were entertained by the TV so I could spend some time reading, looking at pictures, and just remembering. It was nice to have that time today.)
